Fas Spring XI.8 - Finale

Seasons come and seasons go. There goes our fourth... here's what you missed in the last hustle.

Attendees: FB, AS, HR, JH, AP, SN (new member! woo!)

Read: The Kiss; The Alleyway (AP short scenes); I Can't Get Near It (SN play); Fiction (AP episode synopsis)

Two brief short story scenes from Alli, both focusing on the intimate moments between man and woman, the physicality and emotions behind romantic clinches. Both had an air of the poetic to them, as well a great combination of direct physical action-led prose and more flamboyant phrases, like eyes crashing into each other and such. We talked about what place the pieces might find in a longer collection, and indeed whether they should be seen as a pair at all - certainly the actors involved could conceivably have changed, as well as the underlying emotions that imbued each scene.

Next up was Sandy's play and first offering to Fas - thank you kindly. It concerned one Peter and his relationship with three women: his ex-wife, his close (flirtatious) friend, and a new acquaintance whom he tries to date. Sandy writes with a sensitivity for realistic dialogue as well as a great grasp of pace and dramatic timing. Thanks as ever go to our willing readers. As with Alli's first pieces, we talked again about what next for the piece, as well as picking about some of the instances where the drama was not quite so successful. Fortunately there is clearly much that recommends the piece and any changes Sandy makes now will not be with the introduction of entirely new characters or scenes as much as crafting what he already has into something even more functional and engaging.

Finally we took the briefest look at a synopsis by Alli for a TV episode, as part of a competition. Perhaps I should have been sharper with letting everyone know about the competition. Hmm. Anyway - it was a lively write-up for an episode and I know Alli intended to do more on it. We picked apart some of the structure of it, while praising the imagination behind it, and I think Alli had a better idea of the direction she wanted to take it in after that... job done.

Next meeting: after the lovely long summer break. Rest up; write up.

Fas: Spring X.2 - back in business

Disaster strikes! The Cardinal wasn't free! The Cardinal, not free, equals disaster. It's only on leaving the secure bosom of our usual haunt that I realised how utterly enamoured I've become of that cool upper room and the cheap drinks and all. Dammity damn.


Attendees: FB, CW, BL (first time).


So, I think the move and such threw some people. It was also one of those shocker days where I got apologies from six people in the last half hour before the session. No fun!


Discussed: A Still Life (RG); Hasaina Love Jan (FB)


A Still Life was submitted by Becca an age and a half ago. But I dragged it out of the frankbank as something to discuss. Colin read it out for us, and over the noise of our temporary location (Oh Albert, you are a nice pub but too loud), we tried to have some sort of discussion about it. Generally our feelings coincided that while there were elements and characters of interest, more work was required in sorting out temporal shifts and narrative voices to ensure it was more engaging and cohesive. We also felt that if this were a short story, it was woefully undeveloped. As it happens, Becca emailed me to tell me it was the start of a longer narrative, so that was as we had suspected, fortunately.


I then read my third offering to Fas, Hasaina Love Jan, a short story about teenage love and fascination in Hasan Abdal in Pakistan. Some brilliant comments and advice provided by both Bella and Colin, including tweaks to character, language, and, regrettably, the removal of a personal favourite of a paragraph. After all, the destruction of heritage didn't really sit that comfortably next to swooning and excitement and stuffs...oh well....


If anyone has any other comments they want to add, do so, please. (Watch as we hit ZERO comments).

Fas: Spring X.1 - nanowrimo

Still really a background post...but I'm finally catching up. Ish. Maybe.


Attendees: FB, IE, JR, JO, SB


Our first session of 2010 was a bit of a special one. Ellard and I had both taken part in the National Novel Writing Month (nanowrimo) project in November 2009 and were cajoled into presenting our pieces to Fas for ritual humiliation. Ian had read mine, Spire & Pearl; I'd read his, The Otford Raptor. He presented a synopsis and then read selected passages; I did likewise. John, Jake and Sophie listened and were surprisingly kind. It was a strange sort of session: these novels were short, only 50,000 words, and only really first drafts that had been written at a rate of knots. So critique could not really be offered on the overall form, as that was incomplete, or indeed on any individual passage because each author was able to say "well, I'll change that". As such, an odd exercise. But important for two reasons:

1. The stories seemed to remain, in themselves, watertight. Or at least, there was interest from the rest of the group in hearing what happens next and how plot and characters develop. That suggested that at least some of the ideas behind the writing were sound.
2. The individual sections read did hold the attention of the group, to a certain degree, meaning that even if there were plenty of tweaks to be made, at least the prose of a given section was coherent and workable. 

In itself both those things were promising pieces of news.

A personal thanks to Ian for slogging through Spire & Pearl.

Background: Fas 5

This was our fun Christmassy session. We'd hoped to do the nanowrimo reading, but unfortunately Ian was at the last minute unable to join us. So instead, we did other things!


Attendees: FB, SB (new member!), CW, AS, MG (I think)....think that's all. Yup. Checked my notes.


Discussed: Gem and Itch (BI)


Gem and Itch are both short stories by the wondrous Ben, both following fairly similar lines. They both explored fairly dysfunctional male/female relationships, from a male perspective, in which it becomes apparent that the protagonist really has no handle on the world at large at all. Both were written with skill and a satisfying attention to detail, and led to an excellent discussion as to the merits of such a style. Melanie came up as a suitable comparison (read about it here).


December '09.

Background: Fas 4

A bit of a bumper session, this 'un. 


Attendees: FB, HH, AS, CW (new member!), MG, JL in spirit... think that was it. Maybe I'm wrong....hmm....


Discussed: The Hunt (HH); Melanie (JL); three poems (LR); Adam's funny poem (AS)


Henry's piece, The Hunt, described some cavemen of sorts hunting an elephant. It played around with narrative form and stance, and took us from a Kipling-esque benevolent narrator through to a postmodern anti-structuralist voice... It might feature in his new book, too! 


Melanie depicted, amongst other things, the ineffectual weakness of twenty-first century man in all its glory. Melanie moves in with our humble narrator, and sets about stripping him of everything, including the paternity of his child. Some people thought this was all about Melanie as a device for the prefigured womb-creature that would tear about boyfriend and girlfriend; others thought Melanie was just a bit of a bitch. Wry, funny, horrificially self-deprecating, it was a delight to read and discuss.


Lettie and Adam's poems both received a spirited response from the group. It was the first time we read something (Lettie's work) without the author there, which led to an interesting shift in response from the group. I took more of a back seat, taking notes, which meant we got all sorts of things said and discussed to a level of detail that having the author there to clear things up might not have permitted. It was, nonetheless, a worthwhile discussion and much was made of the high quality of the poetry (totally bitchin', yo). 


November '09

Background: Fas 3

The second proper discussion session. Cardinal, as before. Pretty bumper session.


Attendees: FB, IE, JO, RG, MG, LR


Discussed: Why I'm Where I Am (IE); Crushing Butterflies (JO)


Ian's first offering to Fas was a short story all about a chap who was abstaining from sexual congress to try to clear his head a little bit. Written in a faux-obscurist style and riddled with quasi-biographical references, it was the story that contained both fruit and sex for the first time. Afterwards, as we talked about how much fun it was to discuss fruit and sex, something like a tag for the group emerged. Something like that anyway.


John's first offering was a draft of his screenplay for a short. The story follows Alexei, an eccentric puppeteer, and is told through the eyes of his girlfriend, Annie. RG, FB and MG read it, and John sat lording it over us and pondering whether it all really worked. I suppose I can say now that it did, as he's currently (as of February 2010) trying to film the thing...


November '09 or so.

Background: Fas 2

The first proper session. Oh how we wept when the numbering all went wrong after that first session not really being a discussion session. Egad!


Attendees: FB, MG, JO, HH, AS, NG, AH, RG, and maybe some more...?


Discussed: The Legacy (FB); Untitled (RG); Untitled (MG); three sketches (MG)


I know that this is a retrospective, so how much can be said that seems relevant or even memorable now? Little. But some points, of the top of my head:


The Legacy prompted some questions about the writer's idyll - was it really something one might seek? It also got FB thinking about audience, reception, the pairing down of style and the contrast between straight descriptive prose and dialogue.
RG's piece was much more racey, more tight, and perhaps more obscure. It prompted questions about God and was praised for its rhythms and pacing. Perhaps it needed a touch of polish.
MG's pieces all displayed wit and engagement. The sketches were very early drafts to be worked on, but the short story was, despite a couple of slips, thoroughly enjoyable and amusing. FB's comments were all towards tweaks rather than major structural changes. Stylistically the epistolary moments were a particular highlight.


October '09